I don’t know if we answered the question is it possible to cheat in non-monogamous relationships?
Perel wrote Mating in Captivity, a different book, and has written extensively on cheating and infidelity, also talks about it on her show, Where Should We Begin? It’s a really interesting listen. Definitely listen to it. It’s fascinating.
In my mind, that’s like cultivating and creating autonomy between yourself and the person or people that you are with because if you’re with them all the time which is hard right now because we’re all in captivity, no, we’re all like in our home, potentially it’s more challenging to do that but it is still very important. Esther Perel says, “There is nothing like the eroticized gaze of the third to challenge our domesticated perceptions of each other.” Whoa.
Dedeker: Then, like a lot of the stuff that we talked about on the show, Perel also discusses how unlikely it is that our partner is going to provide everything that we could ever want and yet when a partner is not providing absolutely everything that we could ever want, a lot of us are very quick to immediately look for it in others and are sometimes pressured to leave a relationship if a partner is not sexually fidelitous.
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